‘When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. The man said, “The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it.” Then the Lord God said to the woman, “What is this you have done?” The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.” ‘ – Genesis 3:6,12-13


Adam knew what God had said, and did not fight for what he knew was right–even though scripture says he was with his wife when she was tempted by the serpent. Eve also knew what God had said (at least partly), yet she also did not speak up for what was right when the serpent began to speak against God’s decree.  Adam and Eve’s refusal to engage in healthy conflict led to them giving in to what was wrong, and then each seeking someone else to blame for the problem they found themselves in.


Conflict is not bad. Indeed, conflict is a necessary and Christ-like response when righteousness is under fire. Developing a skill for healthy conflict will help me to stand for truth, resist evil, and avoid discord and blame. Even in absence of evil, the best outcomes cannot be achieved without conflict. In a team setting, I need to model what healthy conflict looks like.

Disagreements are ‘ok’.

Differences of opinion are ‘ok’.

The outcome is determined by my willingness to disagree in a healthy way. Taking responsibility to engage in healthy conflict today, will lead to healthy results tomorrow. On the flip side, placing blame on others may be a sign that I previously avoided conflict in an unhealthy way. 

Beneficial battles block bickering and blame.

This year, I need to work on conflict management in the teams that I lead. Not to remove conflict, but to embrace it and welcome it as a necessary and healthy component of growth.


God, thank you for the examples you gave us of your interaction with conflict. Thank you for your word, which teaches me how to interact with others, and achieve healthy outcomes in my relationships. Help me to step forward into conflict in a healthy way, instead of trying to avoid it and them slipping into immature blame and finger-pointing. Help me to model healthy conflict in the teams that I lead, so that I will not perpetuate unhealthy habits and patterns.